You Are Here...what....where is Here?

I like maps. It if fun to see where you are. Where "there" is. Where "here" is in relation to "there". Maps help to orient us and give us a sense of place.

Lately, I have felt a bit mapless. Not completely disoriented...just a bit displaced. "Mapmaker Mapmaker make me a map. Find me a Find. Map me a map." (Sorry, the tune came to me as I was walking this morning). Realizing that this is part and parcel of life, being in a new role, new culture...part of change....I haven't been too anxious about this space. Regardless of how expected something is, though, it can still feel a bit confusing, isolating, and displacing. Not the type of terms one loves to marinate in for too long. You can think "Oh, once I learn more about culture it will be better...I'll do that." "Oh, once I make more friends it will feel better...I can do that." "Oh, once I learn the language it will be a lot better...I will do that." Now these are good & important things to do. They are part of a process but not ends to be anchored on.


This morning I was remembering a time when my dad, sister and I went out moose hunting (sounds really Canadian). Ok, so brother and sister were more along for the ride given our age (hmmm...like 4 & 7...kinda guessing...but young) and limited hunting acumen we stayed back in the bush buggy. Now, I wish I could digress and just talk about the bush buggy and what a cool custom bush-trodding vehicle it was (dad's handiwork)...maybe we can dig around for a photo. Anyway, dad went out to call some moose and Cheri and I stayed back in the vehicle. After a while we got that panic-ish feeling of "where are we...we're alone". Now, we were totally fine and this is not a blog about being abandoned...Dad I know we were fine (smile). The point I am slowly arriving at is that Cheri and I decided we would "just sit here and cry". Overwhelmed (I suppose...I'm sort of recreating this in my head...it was a while ago) by our sense of unknowing and anxiety we just thought it would be best to "sit here and cry".


I was out for a walk this morning and I didn't say those exact words but just kinda felt like I wanted to "sit here and cry". Not because I was really sad or could even put my finger on the "whats + whys" of how I was feeling...just seemed like what might feel good. There is just a time when you feel mentally and emotionally congested and you just what to either figure out where you are, how to navigate the terrain....or maybe just sit and cry.


Ok, so I feel like I need to make a point...or just wrap this up. Here's the point: in life you will feel displaced & disoriented. There are times when you might have a sense of "way forward" or you may need to just pause and get your bearings. I feel like I need to pause and get my bearings. Currently on the Darin iPod has been a great sermon series on John by Keller (ala last Monday's link). I have been hit day after day by the reality of Jesus - Immanuel - God with us. This is a good starting point for getting bearings. The reality of God dwelling among us and not just saying "Hey, watch me, I am your perfect example...do as I do." But saying, "I know you can't do this thing called life on your own or figure it out....you weren't made to ...day in and day out I walk with you. You don't need to figure things out or get your act together in order to come to me. I have done it all....lived the life you couldn't live and died the death you should have died. Come and let me come." (I use the quotation marks loosely of course). This is wild. It just seems like Jesus would have felt such an unreal depth of being displaced. Coming to live among us, taking sin upon himself, and dying. Yet he did not pass the cup and exit stage right. He was about the will of His the Father


So, what does this mean for the displaced...those in this space between. I think it is saying, "Jesus, I can't do it. And it feels like so many things--everything. Come Jesus and you do your it."


Hmmm...I feel like that was a rushed and insufficient capturing of the inner-goings-on. However, I hope that if you feel displaced or disoriented you will be able to say (with your heart if not your mouth), "God come. Father, Son, Spirit, be in my midst....come."


D